Marilyn Isabel McIntosh
… remember to leave the party while you’re having a good time.
Marilyn chose to leave this physical world at about 5 pm on December the 18th, 2023. As a woman who lived life on her own terms, Marilyn chose MAID as her way to be in control of her departure, choosing the when, where and how of it. The MDS blood cancer did not take away her fighting spirit or her sense of freedom, and MAID was Marilyn’s way of poking it in the eye one more time. The ceremony was about love…beautiful, painful, with tears and laughter, as Marilyn told stories and corrected those of us who wished to confer sainthood status upon her. Her life ended with the compassion, gracious dignity and courage that characterized how she lived. She was finally granted peace, while we who were left behind, wept and tried to fathom the depth of our loss.
Marilyn grew up in Current River and with her two chums, Sheila and Eva, learned to stand up for herself and stand up for what she believed to be right. During the 80’s her commitment to social justice was reflected in her involvement in the peace movement. These were difficult days, when speaking up or demonstrating against war was considered a suspicious activity. In one of her early journals Marilyn wrote her Life Mission Statement:
“the greatest personal need I fill by my helping activities is the peace in knowing that although I may not change the world, I’m taking some responsibility for being given the opportunity to live in it.”
She did not allow herself to be afraid to speak up, or hesitate to ruffle a few feathers if that’s what was needed to be heard. She hated racism, greed, entitlement and ignorance. She believed in her ability to make a positive difference in her community as much as she believed in social justice, compassion, equality and the basic goodness of people. She was protective of her beliefs, what she loved and who she loved.
These values guided her throughout her life and several careers which included the Thunder Bay Physical and Sexual Assault Crisis Centre, Thunder Bay Literacy Group, The John Howard Society, City of Thunder Bay Tourism and finally, her dream job, as the Northern Arts Officer for the Ontario Arts Council.
She had the insight to see the natural gifts, strengths and qualities of people, whether it be an artist, a loved one, a friend or a colleague. Marilyn’s willingness to hear another’s story of pain or inner conflict, self doubt, without judgement, and to strategize a solution and to see it through, was her way, drawing out the best in people.
Ken Boshcoff, Mayor, City of Thunder Bay “Marilyn was an enthusiastic and passionate force to be reckoned with. Her belief and love for all things creative and artistic was effervescent and contagious. She will be gratefully and fondly remembered.”
Mark Haslam, Ontario Arts Council Officer “She was an ally in our work to serve all artists and art communities…a precious soul who exuded love and compassion in everything she did.”
Lila Cano, dear friend “Marilyn was such a positive force in so many ways. Justice. Fairness. Ethics. Morals. Laughter. Silliness. She was someone who could cry and I loved that about her. She had an amazing capacity for feeling and sensitivity.”
Maureen Brophy, dear friend “Marilyn always took the time to listen - really listen. She might laugh with you, she might cry with you- she would tell you straight up how things are, but always with compassion, truth and warmth.”
At the end of the day, Marilyn was a Current River girl who’s idea of a perfect morning was dangling her toes in the cold waters of Wild Goose beach then hunting for sea glass, or just sitting on her patio listening to the birds singing, or cloud watching over a cup of espresso.
She was a private person, devoted to her mother Evelyn, her family, her loved ones and her cats.
We were all blessed to have Marilyn in our lives and her love will always reside in our hearts.
We would like to thank Dr Mary Valente, Marilyn’s GP, for her care and support over many years, Dr Simpson and Dr Ward and the entire palliative program, for their expertise, compassion and support for Marilyn and our family. We would also like to thank the nurses of the CMH clinic, Joanna, Katy, Kat, Jenna, and so many other welcoming folk for their expertise, empathy and support throughout this difficult time.
Marilyn is survived by her husband Mark Tabor, sister Patricia Seabrook-McIntosh and her children Anna Seabrook-Grieve (Mike) and Daniel Seabrook, her brother Don McIntosh (Linda) and his children Barb McIntosh (Manny) and Douglas McIntosh, Marilyn’s sister-in-law Gerin O’Brien(Kevin), and her children Carly Mithrush (Joey) and Tyler O’Brien (Kiersten), and numerous cousins, grand nieces and grand nephews. Marilyn was predeceased by her father Duncan McIntosh and her mother Evelyn McIntosh.
A Celebration of Life for Marilyn McIntosh will be held on Monday January 29 at the Thunder Bay Art Gallery, Confederation College Campus, from 1 to 3 pm.
In lieu of flowers, donations to The Cancer Foundation, Thunder Bay Regional Health Sciences Centre, would be greatly appreciated.
In the next provincial election, support the party that will provide adequate funding for our public medical health system, not the party that puts privatization and profit ahead of patient care.
Condolences may be made through www.nwfainc.com
